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When I first moved into my current home, I hated my room. Actually, I hated a lot about the way the house looked. It was dark and brown and ugly and yuck. Really yuck. Over the first 6-8 months of living here I toyed with the idea of moving to a new place, then one day I made the decision to quit whining and being miserable and really start putting effort into the space around me. I did some serious thrifting, grabbing great retro blankets, throws, wall hangings and bric a brac to make the space around me really feel like it was mine.
A couple of months later Carly J moved in and all of a sudden this space that I'd built up around me, my space, had to be shared with another. It was tough, for sure, but it was also wonderful to be able to share it with someone that I loved. Still, it never really felt like our space. I felt frustrated by the fact that I had less room to move, that my things would move around the room, that there was a mess in my room that was not mine (if the mess was created by me, somehow I could live with that, but when it wasn't... not good). She felt fristrated that the room was largely dominated by my things, hers barely got a look in for a long while.
On top of this, I'm a bit of a night owl. I tend to get the most work of the highest quality well after dark. It's rare that I'll head to bed before midnight of my own accord. So when I had this other person in my space who had to rise at 6:30am most mornings I resorted to watching TV shows and DVDs on the laptop with the headphones in every single night instead. It was okay though, that's what you do in relationships. You compromise. And if it wasn't for the fact that I still regularly worked nights then maybe I would have made more of an effort to adjust my sleeping patterns. Maybe. Okay, probably not.
Being a night owl and having the freedom to do what I want, when I want is incredibly important to me, it's a huge part of who I am and how I function in this crazy world. Becuase of this, my room, my space, my domain, is incredibly important to me. Having to share this space was perhaps more difficult for me than I realised at the time, and it's only now that I have my space back that I can recognise this.
I do everything in my room. Everything. I eat, sleep, entertain (myself and others), craft, create, blog... Part of this is because I live in a share house with two other girls who's lifestyles and work schedules vary quite significantly form my own, but this is also becuase I just like to be in my own space, making a mess or just plain banging around without having to worry about bothering someone else.
I should mention that Carly J never requested that I change my sleeping patterns, or stop doing what I do late at night, it was a decision that I made on my own, though of course with her and our relationship in mind. I think that it's a really beautiful thing to be able to make the decision to share your space with someone else, but I do think that I've learnt a great deal about myself after my first experience in doing so. Perhaps next time I'll suggest separate rooms...
Haylz x